Identity Crisis

We’re moving to Washington. My husband, who has so far followed my career, has a new job there and it’s my turn to follow him. I truly feel that every career is a calling from God, and this is where God is calling him. I’m excited, but I’m nervous.

I am a pastor. I have always been a minister. I mean always. High school, Jr. High. Always. It’s who I am. Making this move means that I won’t be paid to be a minister – at least not for a while. Pastor Jana is becoming a stay-at-home mom. I’m not sure how I feel about this.

I have great respect, even awe, for stay-at-home moms. I think dedicating every moment of your day to your kids is the most difficult job in the world. I’ve never been sure it’s for me. Yet here I am.

My mom got me a refrigerator magnet that says “All Moms Work.” When I have told people I’m leaving, I have received nothing but encouragement and support. People, men and women, understand that children grow up way to fast and most wish they’d had more time with their own kids. I am blessed to have this opportunity. I’m excited, too. I have been very stressed trying to work full time while being a full-time mom. But I’ve done it. And now I won’t be. I’ll be a mom.

My identity should be in Christ., regardless of my title. I’ve been preaching lately about doing individual ministry and taking time to form relationships with non-Christians. And maybe this is my chance. But still, I’ll be a stay-at-home mom. When someone asks what I do, the answer is “I’m a mom”. When I go to church, I’ll be just another church member. When I wake up in the morning, all I’ll have to do is take care of my kids and house. A mom.. And I start this new job in just 3 weeks.